Father’s Day Ruminations

How would my life have been different if I had the love and support of a father?

All of the Facebook posts about fathers feel alien to me, as if I am reading about an actual space alien sighting or watching blurry video of Bigfoot.  There is just no sense of recognition going on in my brain. And right now, with my depression deepening, it only adds to my sense of alienation from the world around me. Will this feeling of not belonging anywhere ever go away?

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5 responses to “Father’s Day Ruminations”

  1. Kathy says :

    I’m not a therapist and rarely know what I’m talking about, but here’s what I’m thinking about. First, the lack of a loving and supportive father. My dad was not an easy man. Growing up, I would say he was the opposite of loving, even with my mom. I was angry about all that for a very long time, especially after my mom died. A wise woman (my sister) told me that’s the way he was, and it’s time to let go. Easy? Not even close. Worth it? Oh, yeah. It won’t do you any good to wonder “what if.” And, as you’re finding out, it may hurt you.
    Depression — I have years of experience with that! Therapy, medication, talking, fighting, surviving. I think I’ve done it all, and I have more good days than bad. I continue with therapy because I know how depression can come back when I least expect it.
    Distract yourself from Father’s Day. Do something to occupy your mind. If you’re not in treatment, please get some.
    I could go on, but I’ll close here. You can email me any time. Hugs.
    Kathy

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    • Kathy says :

      I’m sorry if I sounded pushy. I was trying to make suggestions, but they sounded like orders. Honey, I am here for you. ❤️

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  2. Amy says :

    I hear you and hold you in my heart.

    Like

  3. Jean Haberhern says :

    The twists and turns of life echo in our brains with so many messages—happy/sad; joyous/depressing; calm/excited; love/hate. The drastic ups and downs are taxing to the soul and our ability to cope. With age comes the realization that life has not always been fair, but worth the comforts of warm loving hugs from grandkids–in your case–August. Aggravations seem less so when we can surround ourselves with, kids, pets and a host of positive caring people who love us unconditionally. I do not know you personally, my online friend—but, have often been uplifted by your kind words and caring nature. I choose caring/sharing every time and as one of my heroes, Connie Schultz often comments–may the day land gently you and all who are hurting.

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